How I compare my dog to the 2nd grade steno

It is the fall. The start of school brings all new sorts of ways to measure performance. We have stars, numbers, incentives, fun Fridays, notes sent home, laps to run, etc., etc. Teachers have all sorts of ways of trying to whip kids in to shape. I know these measures work, even though I have never found myself good at using them at home. Once past potty training, I was glad to never see a sticker chart around this house ever again.

I have decided that if I were to make such a performance/behavior measure it should be for my dog. Truly at this stage of my life he can cause me the most grief. Some days, but not always. Let's imagine that Blitzen had his own steno for me to sign. Across the bottom were the numbers 1-5. He would lose a number for disobeying and have a consequence.

1. Does not get along well with others (dogs that is!)

2. Does not urinate in the appropriate stall or at the appropriate times

3. Is destructive to property

4. Barks when not called on or when not raising his paw

5. Sleeps during class but is ready to play at 4pm!

So those who know me know that I do not love my dog. I tolerate him. He is cute and that is the only reason he is still around. OK Claire and Scott like him too! He is disobedient and impossible to control. So today I made him run laps. 6 miles in one lap around Forest Park. It was the first time I have ever taken him there and by he end he was pooped! I frequently idealize what it is like to have a dog. I see people running with their dogs and I want their dog. Today I think some crazy people might have wanted my dog. I got a few head tilts or "oh he is so good!" So maybe the running laps part maybe will really fix the bad behaviors. Maybe what works for kids, does work for dogs. Who knew?

This brings me to the 2nd grade steno...
At CCS in 2nd grade you get to write your daily assignments in a steno pad. Below the assignments the kids write the numbers 1-5 and then there is a stamp where the parent signs that the child has completed the assignments. If there is bad behavior numbers will get crossed out. Claire and Emma had one number crossed off the ENTIRE year of second grade. Sam got 2 numbers crossed off on Monday and another one yesterday. Seriously. Once was for writing in his steno when he was supposed to be praying. The other one was for talking loudly when he was supposed to be whispering. HA! Do you know Sam Smout? He does not have a whisper voice. He talks loud all the time. He only has one volume and it is on max!

When I talked to Sam about his loss of numbers on his steno, he did not seem upset at all. He just said, "I just had to run laps mom. It's no big deal."

So there you have it.